Dozens of non-oncology drugs can kill cancer cells

For today's offcology rounds.

Antarctic ice sheet retreat could trigger chain reaction

Like ice launch into your face from a good beverage.

Eastern Psychology might offer removing desire for each of the passions as a way to remove the thoughts created by those emotions, as created by desire (i.e., hypothalamus).

Western Psychology achieves this with psychotropic drugs.

Materials that can revolutionize how light is harnessed for solar energy

According to a panel of experts.

Putting the ‘bang’ in the Big Bang

The big bang needs a haircut.

Positive outlook predicts less memory decline

Positive outlook is good looking out.

Buddhist monks do not attempt to only sit around being “mindful.”

Although it’s gotta be easier to meditate in those robes than in skinny jeans.

Unexpected uncertainty can breed paranoia

Expected certainty can breed pronoia.

Soft tactile logic’ tech distributes decision-making throughout stretchable material

Yoga pants became a smart choice.

Red dwarf starlight suitable to grow photosynthesizing bacteria

That time when mold anywhere starts to eat sun.

Attraction: Females go for more masculine features in short-term, less masculine features in the long-term.

That's why for tonight, we use Tinder, and for retirement, we use Tender.

Taking the temperature of dark matter

Stick out your tongue and say awesome.

ESO instrument finds closest black hole to Earth

Suprise it's Florida.

Astronomers detect possible radio emission from exoplanet

Conservatives bought up talk radio there too.

The U.S. has a higher rate of poverty than some other industrialized nations.

That's right, the US isn't just winning in obesity rates, we have poverty locked down too.

Artificial intelligence yields new antibiotic

AI comits genocide against bacteria.

Are black holes made of dark energy?

Man Science is racist.

A billion tiny pendulums could detect the universe’s missing mass

It doesn't take any to tell the universe's skipping church.

Ontogenesis is how an egg becomes a mind.

Not to be confused wth Torontogenesis, which is how an egg becomes a Canadian citizen.

Repairing stroke-damaged rat brains

Rats apparently hang out in golf holes.